Thursday, December 16, 2010

13 Lucky Things I Learned in 2010

1.Everyone else is just as afraid as I am to assert what they really want and to be who they really are. But if I go first, even when I'm scared shitless, others will overcome their fears and do it too. The world will become more meaningful and beautiful.

2.Time does not pass at the same speed for everyone. I need to keep this in mind when creating expectations for myself and others.

3.Money is freedom. I wish that weren't the case, but in our world, it's true. It doesn't take a lot of money to have freedom, but it does take at least enough to create an exit door when you need one. Learning to save is not a virtue. It is a precious tool of survival.

4.There is a sort of frantic, overcompensating rush of words I sometimes find spilling out of my mouth. I realize now that it only happens when I force myself to try to be something I cannot and do not want to be.

5.Changing my mind does not make me insincere. Only lying to myself or others about how my mind has changed would make me insincere.

6.If I think another human being is beautiful, I should never fail to tell them, even if it scares me to say it.

7.I am not obligated to have children. If I want to someday, I can, but it's not required.

8.Comfort is safe and easy, but does not create excitement or stimulate growth. I don't think it's for me. Constant intoxication glimmers with a beauty matched only by the darkness of its destructive impact. I don't think it's for me. In 2011, I will find or create something that falls somewhere in between.

9.Christmas means more when you spend no money at all. All I want for Christmas is to have Brynn read Dickens's A Christmas Carol out loud while Ahren, Megan, Grandma Lo, Kim, and I sip tea, eat those caramel wafer things, and put a jigsaw puzzle together.

10.It is okay to take as much time as I need to make major life decisions, even when they affect other people in my life. Taking time to make the right decision does not mean I am wasting other people's time. They are responsible for their own lives. It is up to them to make sure their lives do not feel wasted. It is up to me to make sure mine does not feel wasted.

11.If I find myself pushing someone else too hard, it might be myself I am subconsciously trying to set free.

12.If I want something badly enough, doors WILL open. They will open because I will finally stop being a lazy coward and begin to do the things I know I need to do to open the doors.

13.I am love.

What did you learn, dear readers?


  1. I can name one thing I learned just now:
    Some of the most precious beliefs in my life are shared by another person, and can be said simply and beautifully. Thank you.

  2. This list is beautiful. And so brave. I will use the knowledge it brought me to create my own list of things I've learned in 2010 (or things I want to learn in 2011!).

    Well said.